A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
