Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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