How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
