I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Randomize
