I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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