it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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