i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize