you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Randomize