how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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