Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize