I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
