Swine flu. Run for my life!
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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