I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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