I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
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you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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