It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
