Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
