I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
