Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize