so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize