Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
