Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
