I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize