I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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