I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
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it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
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True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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