i jhust puked up my retainher.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
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