dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
