if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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