Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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