I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
