so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
