Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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