We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
