Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize