We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.