Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
