Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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