Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I need water and some morals
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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