my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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