is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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