So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
