You can't special order awesome
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
whose ass print is on the piano?
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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