Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
