The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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