i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i came on her dog
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
