My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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