u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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