My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
is wine microwaveable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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