is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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