Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Randomize
