what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize