my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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